Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
