Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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