I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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