If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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