He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
