Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize