fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
