Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
