i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
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and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
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Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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