So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize