Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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