I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
