I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
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Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
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That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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