May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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