i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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