We're like a lot better than the average bears
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
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