Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I fill condoms, not promises.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
