Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize