Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
