All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
