I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
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Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
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I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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