You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
jump out the window naked night went bad
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
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