I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
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And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
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7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
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