Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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