nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
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