she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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