Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
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