i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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