if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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