so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Farmville is her only friend.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
