i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Randomize