saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
that's an acceptable place to lick
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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