You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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