He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
