..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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