He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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