Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
