Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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