I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
