So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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