Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Randomize
