I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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