would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
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This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
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Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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