He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Yo dont text me then not text me
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
