i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
