the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Randomize
