This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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