I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
