Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
