Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Randomize
